No anticipated results + No pat on my shoulder + No favourable circumstances = I quit
This has been my equation for so long. I have always needed evident results to carry on any work. For me to stay encouraged and not to give up on anything, I always need someone to cheer me up and believe in me so I can trust in myself. Good outcomes keep me motivated to go ahead and the opposite of them makes me give up.
So, on one particular day, when I noticed that I had been getting few views and visitors on my blog posts, I came to the conclusion that I probably should quit writing as there are not many people who are relating with what I want to share. Writing and sharing a blog post has always been a lonely journey for me but at this very moment when I couldn’t see many views on the view bar, I felt I am not making a big difference through my writing. I felt unqualified and uncreative in running a blog.
Around 11:00 in the night as I went off to bed, I remembered a close friend with whom I hadn’t shared my blog link. So I thought, I would send the link to her as this would be my last post. I sent the link and I was typing a message to her saying that “I think I may quit writing as not many people……”. Half way through typing, an e-mail notification popped onto my phone screen at 11:02 pm. The headline of the e-mail was “When troubles come, keep going”.
I stopped typing her the message and opened the e-mail tab to read. The heading caught my attention to read the full e-mail. It was from Pastor Rick Warren’s ministry which I subscribed to years back. It contained an encouraging message:
“Faithful servants don’t give up at the first sign of difficulty. They keep on keeping on.
You know how a little acorn becomes an oak tree?
An oak tree is just an acorn that refused to give up.
It’s always too soon to give up.
God uses tough times to test our persistence.
In fact, Saddleback Church went 15 years without a building. In the first 13 years, the church used 79 different facilities.
You know how many times Pastor Rick felt like giving up?
Nearly every Monday morning!
But God said to him, “Rick if I never give the church a building, would you still serve me?” And he said, “Absolutely!”
Saddleback church grew to more than 10,000 people before it got its first building.
God is more interested in what you are becoming than in what’s happening to you. He often allows trials in your life to teach you diligence, determination and character.
The problem you are going through right now is a test of your faithfulness.
Will you continue to serve God even when life is tough?“
It looked like it was a coincidence I was getting this e-mail at the exact time I was deciding to quit. However, deep down I felt it was God wanting me to read this message at that very moment of my decision and asking me through this e-mail “Even if there will only be a very few people who resonate with your writing, will you continue to serve me through it”?
And with tear-filled eyes I said, “Absolutely Lord, I will write for your glory not mine”
The anxious and heavy feelings of my decision to quit were replaced with hope-filled and convincing feelings of my decision to continue my writing even if it was meant for a smaller audience. At the same time I realized that my service to Him shouldn’t be dependent on the rise or fall of the view bar but it should simply be dependent on my dedication to serve Him. And I needed to let this truth get really deeper into my heart and mind.
The next morning, my close friend to whom I sent the link wrote to me that the blog post I shared was profound, insightful and deals with many questions she asks God and herself. She needed to read it at that very moment and maybe God wanted to use my words to encourage her that day.
I have kept avoiding this instance to share as a blog post but today I felt to share it just to encourage you to keep serving God with what you have and let Him accomplish His purpose through your life. Let not the momentum of your service to Him be dependent on the expected results, the funds, the public applauds, the views and likes you gain or even lack of them. But let it be centred to only one purpose – to glorify Him and to build His kingdom.
Even if your service means helping a very few people, even if it’s not gaining any anticipated outcomes, even if it means you need to stand alone in what you believe, even if it feels like a very few people relate with your story, even if you feel you aren’t making a bigger difference, will you continue to serve Him through your life?